'Tis Better to Tell

Two days ago, the 55th governor of New York State was sworn into office. Before he could get settled into his wing-backed chair, he let the world know he stepped out on his wife during a marital slump. From then on, news stations fielded commentary from outraged citizens wondering why government officials couldn't keep it in their pants. According to one researcher, the public shouldn't expect politicians to be any more moral than the average Joe. She then quoted a study which found 75% of married men and 50% of married women have extramarital affairs. This means you could throw two rocks into a crowd and hit a cheater. That's just sad!

Some people were fairly baffled after the Gov. Patterson press conference confession. Why would he put his business on front street, especially after ex-governor Spitzer has become every comedians kinky sex joke punchline? Simple. He knew as soon as they announced his governorship, the "other woman" was on the phone with Random House. She probably already typed up a draft of their sexcapades during his term as lieutenant governor and was just waiting for him to take the next step to increase the value of her tell all. Patterson knew he better make his announcement before any tapes, stained clothing or descriptions of unmentionables surfaced.

In politics these days, the "tis better to tell" strategy is the only way to go. This isn't like years ago when people kept secrets at all costs. Now you can bet your bottom dollar people are taking notes when you speak and saving souvenirs when you creep. With the finance world in disarray, it seems the only big business left is secret selling. If the extramarital affair statistic is true, 36 other governors should be calling press conferences soon...or creating revenue for mistresses.